Tuesday, April 2, 2013


The past three weeks seem like a whirlwind. One of my brothers and my sister came to town to visit with Mom and my Dad left town and left a big mess behind him. I am sorry but I am tired of cleaning up after him and I didn't this time. He called me after he left town and told me that his apartment had been left unlocked and I could take what I wanted to and get rid of the rest. Well, the apartment management did not agree with that. Since it is a locked community, we could not allow access for prospective buyers to come in and management said they needed permission from my Dad before they would let us have that. They said they called him several times and left messages but he never returned their calls so we couldn't sell any of the items. Of course, this way, the complex gets to sell the items as 'abandoned property' and keep any funds they can get for them. Bev and Wendell were able to take a few personal items that they wanted and I took all of the photographs and memorabilia. The rest of the belongings were left in the apartment, just like he left them. The apartment was dirty and smelled awful. The trash can was full. The dishwasher had dirty dishes in it. Even dishes in the cabinets had been put up dirty. He left town without giving proper notice on his apartment lease and the manager advised that he will be billed for another month's rent. He will also be billed for cleaning the apartment and hauling out the garbage and the possessions that were left. I guess he thought I would clean out the apartment for him but I did not. He left the mess so he is responsible for it. Of course, as he said before, the management has to find him first.

We brought about 5 boxes of photos/memorabilia home and I sat down on the living room floor and sorted it all out. Then, I boxed stuff up by sibling and got the packages mailed to everyone. Each of us got photos of ourselves and our families as well as report cards, class photos...stuff like that. The photos of Mom I kept and am planning to scan them all and get copies of them to everyone. There was a lot of stuff to go through. A lot of cards Mom saved...birth announcements, graduation announcements, wedding invitations. A lot of life...none of which would be here if it weren't for Mom. How sad that she sits quietly in a world with no memories of all of this life that she is responsible for. Since Dad left things the way he did, her household possessions and furniture will be donated or trashed or sold by the apartment complex...however they want to handle it. All of her personal things have been given to her children now so we can reflect on them and remember for her.

I feel sorry for my Dad. It must be awful to be 80 years old, have 6 children, 12 grandchildren and 3 great-grandchildren and still be all alone. He brought it all on himself with his mean and selfish ways but I think the worse part of it all is that he doesn't think he has done anything wrong...he always blames everything that goes wrong on someone else. I am just thankful that he isn't hurting Mom any more.

I ask for continued prayers for my whole family...each of us is trying to deal with all that is going on in our own way. We have done all that we can...now it is time to place things in God's hands.

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